Adventures with a 5 year old...

So this weekend, we "borrowed" my little cousin (who I call my niece and she calls me her aunt, thats just how our family works), I may question whether terrible twos extends to five year olds, while it was definitely an adventure here are the highs and the lows:

Most Entertaining things

1) Visiting the apple orchard where we went on a hay ride, picked out a pumpkin and went through this great corn maze with a treasure hunt for kids

2) It seems like with a five year old there is always something to do, it is sooo go go which can be nice when it isn't your norm

3) She went to sleep at like 7:30pm

Not so Entertaining things

1) 7:30 am Wake up

2) the if I'm good will you buy me this x 100

3) Her absolute terror of our not so frightening Basset Hound 

OOOOoooooh the Obama Excitement

So as the worst new lawyer ever, and I don't mean that in the I suck at my job kinda way (I may very well I just don't really know) more the has worked less than 2 months and has had to take time off for her husbands surgery and her mouth surgery I feel generally guilty that I don't work enough, but NOT guilty enough to resist asking if I could go to the Obama rally, it was two blocks away and a straight shot view from my office, who could sit by and watch history in the making from 10 stories up, not this girl.  I was really pretty impressed with La Crosse, a turn out of 15,000 or somewhere near there is really pretty great for a town of like 55,000!! In the grand scheme of things I even had a pretty good place in the massive crowd.  I think it was a great speech generally and one that was worth listening to regardless of your political background, he is just so charismatic, or maybe he just seems that way because we have had 8 years of horrible public speaking by Bush, not really sure.  Needless to say it was worth standing there in the chilly line almost two hours before it started to hear him speak for 40 min, this is by far the first election I have cared to hear someone speak or had the opportunity, I even went out today and put our sign in our yard, J is wondering if it will inspire anyone else on our street to put out signs.  I was a bit bummed I didn't get any pictures, for whatever reason I though cameras were a no no so I went sans mine.  We had this guy who was right behind us who sketched pictures of the crowd the whole time we were there, he was a pretty good artist. I really enjoyed seeing the diversity in the crowd, children, adults, people of all ages and backgrounds, coming together with hope for change, it definitely made you want to act, so I said I would try to keep this blog from getting too political so I will just leave it at no matter your party, just please remember to take the time Nov. 4 to vote! I won't even try and tell you who to vote for, well unless you drive by my house =)

Fall is in the Air

Well it is now time for Oktoberfest to end, which really signals the start of Fall.  It was a bit crazy this year in that we normally aren't very organized we just kinda show up at the parade to sit with whatever friends took the time to reserve spots and pretty much just enjoy the work they put into it, well not this year, this year we took the bull by the horns and organized our own parade spot. Some of you may think Im crazy like what is this person talking about but let me put it into perspective this is like a 6 mile parade which thousands of people attend.  The parade is on Saturday and by Friday morning at 8am people have already put out their chairs, blankets, couches etc. some are even camped out, why camped out you say?, because they know that because of problems in years past you actually aren't allowed to leave things on the curbside unattended before midnight, therefore at 4pm that day the City came through and took all those naughty peoples things and threw them away.  So fast forwards to 11:30 pm when we show up to stake out our spot, realize all the good ones are taken, but then by miracle some really nice guys explain to us that at 12 they plan to move up and over a bit and that we can have this L shaped spot that gives us about 5 feet of prime curbage, gotta have the curbage for the kiddies as that is where the candy gets thrown, so thanks to them we got pretty lucky. So we had to run back get more sheets since our tarp wasn't big enough and stuff to hold it all down over night, came back and set it out and sat there til 12:30am to make sure it wasn't going anywhere, then back home to be asleep around 1, so we could get up at 6 to head back and make sure our stuff was ok (the parade is at 10).  Then at about 6:45 I get a text saying our shirts were in but at the southside so we had to fight traffic and no parking to get to it, while in the area we headed over to festival to get some snacks and ingredients for bloody marys, we were back and at our site by 8:30 where we hung out til the rest of the gang arrived.  It was a long rough parade though the weather was beautiful, it was full of kiddies that were too tired, fighting over candy (who throws one piece for like 7 kids) and the fact that it was like 80 something, by the time it was all over with (at like 2) I was totally beat and starving, we tried to head to this awesome drive in but due to the parade traffic was miserable so after like 20 min of no moving we headed to Holmen to go to their drive in, got all the way there and found out it had closed the Sunday before, total bummer at this point we are sooo starved we just head to McDonalds.  While it was definitely a ton of fun it was super exhausting, next year we already have a list of things we need to do differently like bigger tarp, 4 wheel cooler not 2 wheel, remember to buy vodka the night before, just bring a bag of candy and randomly throw in front of kids.  Anyway I will post some pics later and while I know I made it sound miserable if any of you are ever anywhere near La Crosse during Oktoberfest I do highly recommend you go!! 

Where or where has my blogging gone....

Eeeks it is soo busy around here, and not in the I have such an exciting life that I have no time to blog kinda way.  Rather it is the I drive like 70 miles to work and stay in WI usually 3-4 days a week.  Who knew I would be home again sleeping on my mom's couch in my mid twenties.  I have to say mid twenties because I cannot accept that I am on the side now closer to 30, that Birthday came and went the 17th of September and let me tell you it was the first birthday I truly did NOT want to celebrate.  Though it was a lot of fun, one of the upsides of staying in WI is I get to see and spend a lot of time with my family, so on my birthday my grandma, aunt and mom and I went shoe shopping at Macy's (about as good as it gets in La Crosse) and out to a movie.  We went to see the Women, and here silly me made it through the ENTIRE movie without even noticing that there are NO MEN in the movie, just women, I guess hence the name.  It was definitely cute but in a heartwarming chic flick way, not the comedy I expected.  This weekend though I am super excited for the Maple Leaf parade, and some good old Oktoberfest fun, I am sure there will be loads to blog about because people do all kinds of silly and crazy things at Oktoberfest, and Im really excited for this year because we are getting shirts (see image above), all due to someone else's awesome creativity not mine.  

Retail Details I hope I will never need to know again

I think today may may may have been my last day at the store in the mall, and while I was there I couldn't help but think of this strange skill set I have developed that hopefully I will never need to use again... such as:

1. The ability to be able to fold almost any item of clothing into a teensy teensy tiny perfect square, without even using the stupid folding boards (yes Im that good, 10 years of retail will do that to you) While some of you may be thinking I could use this skill in my own house and save loads of space in my drawers, closets etc. please see the 10 year part above, NEVER AGAIN in fact it kinda makes me want to empty all my drawers onto my bedroom floor and play in the clothes like kids play in piles of leaves, ahhh the chaos and messiness of it all, I LOVE IT!

2. The ability to totally lie to a person about how something looks on them- I know you're thinking Im awful and Im talking about selling you something that looks truly awful on you but really most of the time it's just trying to find a nice way to tell you not to buy it, like while that fits you really well Im not sure that pink complements your skin color why don't you try this blue shirt as opposed to wow I never knew a human could so closely resemble a flamingo  

3. Biting my tongue at repeat returners- perhaps the biting my tongue think will come in handy when I have kids but as for retail, really people TRY THINGS ON unless you shop here all the time and I mean like every week, stuff changes, things fit differently and rarely are you ALWAYS a size 10, also when your favorite store is closing in 3 months and your whining to me and asking me why we are closing, WELL its because you just bought $400 of clothes online and just returned them all at our store (pssst that affects our sales)

4. Add ons- This one isn't so much a knowledge but all those annoying greeting, add on sale things we have to hit you with, like hey you can save 10% if you open a ____ credit card today, yup you would save $2.00 on that sale sweater and it will affect your credit score forever, sounds like a stellar deal huh, sign here please, or if you just spend $28 more dollars I can give you this excellent coupon that you can't use for 3 weeks and will probably lose or forget about but come on please please please  buy that shirt over there so I can get rid of these coupons and be able to stop asking you this!! 

5.  Store Set/Back Stock- The mental map of where things are in the store, where they are in the back room and all the little techniques I can use to convince you we really don't have it in back, while some people just flat out lie and say no we don't have that, I usually go look for things because then I get to sneak off to the peaceful back room and take a sip of latte before I can come out and sorrowfully tell you that no we do not have that in a size 10, there is a chance we could get it in next week and that you could try back then because hope always seems to get you to leave me alone, people like hope, and I have found that if you don't go to the back and check for it people don't believe you when you say no I'm sorry we don't have that in back or we are all out of XL's since we only usually get like 2 in but people automatically presume your lying I swear its like people think our 1400 square foot store has a backroom the size of Walmart and how on earth could we ever ever be out of anything in anyones size, sometimes we only get things in 1 of each size and then because we are greedy greedy associates we buy half those for ourselves, its our reward for dealing grouchy customers so when I say we don't have a small I know because I bought it yesterday so go buy it online so you can return it in the store like you always do

Ahhh farewell retail, how I will miss you not!!!  

Sisterhood Tees!!!!

I know this is a bit outdated but as someone who absolutely loves the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants books, owns the movie and took her younger sister to the newest movie (Have to hold on to my youth somehow and I really think these are great books with good values and entertaining to boot) I absolutely loved Hillary Clintons reference to the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsuits, and then today I found these TEES!!! and fell in love!!! Now if only I could figure out which one I want.  My birthday is in 13 days and I think it would make an excellent present!! Along with cupcakes, we can never forget about cupcakes!! I love cupcakes, maybe even more than these tees, but its close very very close!

I know its an obsession with names

SOOOOO while I totally don't want to go in a whole political direction, I get way enough of that talk at work from my ultra conservative colleague, has anyone else stopped to wonder about Palin's name choices for her kids, they seem a bit non republican for such an ultra conservative. Also while Im hoping she named her daughter for something other than a motor speedway, that is all that pops into my mind when I hear her name and for whatever reason that triggers thoughts of the Mazda zoom zoom commercials, I think in my mind her daughter may forever be nicknamed zoom zoom. Sorry while other people boggle the more important issues such as economics and foreign policy, I wonder about things like name choices, sigh. 

Up, Down, Upside Down

Oy with the sickness. There is nothing routine in this household, so when someone says routine appendectomy  that isn't us.  So as a result we were home on Thursday and back on Saturday morning where we got to spend 12 hours in two different ER rooms until finally at 11pm Jeff got admitted to St. Marys.  While there are people dying in the ER and I TOTALLY GET THAT but it would be nice if at some point someone would ask you if there was anything that they could do for you, for example we didn't get to eat for the entire 12  hours, were freezing our butts off, had no idea what we were waiting for or what was going to happen, no one could answer any questions, all they kept saying is we'll check on you in like an hour or so... and then we'll look in in another hour. If I don't see a hospital for a really long time I will not be disappointed.  We finally got sent home saying well we are pretty sure it is a colon infection, take this medicine, we can't really do anything about it so if you're not better in a few days give us a call. Oy I tell you Oy

Neither here nor there

I haven't totally disappeared, not that anyone reads this anyway. It has been a CRAZY couple of weeks. I started my new job in La Crosse, and the drive isn't terrible mostly just the cost of gas and getting home at like 6:15 at the super earliest really cuts your evening, and then during the first work party my husband's appendix decides it wants out, he wasn't actually at the party rather at the ER (total downside of working 1.5 hours from home was that I was completely out of the loop while all this is going on) so in the course of roughly 5 hours his stomach started to hurt, he went to the ER and they decided he just might need his appendix out asap! What an awful little organ in that it can do no good only bad, its like the black sheep of organs. Maybe its mad because it doesn't have a purpose so it has evolved into a secret assassin over the years deciding to try to kill its landlord every now and then, yeah I know where do I come up with this crap.  Anyway I am the worse nurse ever, I am a total fixer however I cannot fix this and therefore it frustrates me to no end.  Also we had the meanest nurse ever, she was like trying to push J out the door 3 hours after his surgery, when his blood pressure plummeted and he had trouble breathing she finally laid off him but really I know they like to push people out and all but 3 hours after a 5am surgery when it took til 2am to get the poor guy settled into a room, leaving like no time for sleep the night before is a bit ridiculous.  Then he had to stay over since he wasn't recovering quite fast enough so she was just totally off base trying to boot him like that.  Needless to say it will be a pretty mild labor day weekend here.  Im fighting with all the animals who don't understand why they are being locked out of the bedroom, Ella makes a break for it every chance she can get but she is the most dangerous since her 30 pounds slamming into his stomach would be pretty awful. So here I sit a zookeeper more than anything else for the time.

Fondue You Fondue Me

Does anyone else have random wedding gifts that they have never used.  We have an awesome fondue maker that we actually registered for after having fondue with some friends one night.  We got the fondue maker and alas it has sat in its box for like two years. We figured that it was finally time to bring it out and use it.  The last time we had fondue we remember that the cheese was not very good but everything else turned out great.  We checked out Cost Plus World Market to see if they had any goodies to use for Fondue and they sold all different kinds of chocolate shavings to use for chocolate fondue but the only cheese they sold was a boxed, dry, packaged cheese from switzerland that you had to soak the baggie in water before opening it up and pouring the packaged cheese into the fondue maker, this scared us a bit, let alone the amount of preservatives that must be in that cheese. So basically what Im saying here is if anyone has any advice on where to get great cheese/chocolate for fondue or any awesome fondue recipes we could really use them. Im going to try to see what I can find in Mpls tomorrow when I go and hopefully I can find something good there but I know certain kinds of cheese work better than others so any advice on what anyone has tried and what hasn't or has worked would be great!

Are we getting old?

This weekend I went to see my awesome GPB girls for a reunion. We spent all day in Madison on a pontoon boat on a lake (not the lake since we were not on Mendota but rather a lake). We are all between the ages of I want to see the youngest like 24 to 26 maybe. I think this is still pretty young, none of us on the boat have kids yet though some are starting to plan for that in the near future and others are are avoiding in like the plague but what was more disturbing were the topics of gray hairs and spider veins.  At one point like 6 people on the boat were comparing their spider veins whatever the heck they are, I apparently don't have them and was left out of this discussion, which I guess I didn't mind since I figure better to not have them and not be included than to have them and have to show them to everyone.  I did google them and while there is a chance that I may get varicose veins at some point because they run in my Dad's family I can't really think of anyone in my family with spider veins, so maybe I will remain good there.  But really the point of all this is how is it that we're already getting old this young.  I have no idea if between the highlights I have gray hairs I certainly am not going to comb through my hair looking for them and believe me if I find them Im not sharing, I guess I could see where it would be upsetting to find them but its funny how for a group so set on going out and having fun and being young to have so much talk about how old we're getting, and for me the a-typical 25 year old who doesn't ever go out because she really can't stand the taste of alcohol which like no one on this planet or at least anyone who ever went to WI-Platteville can seem to understand to actually pick up on this was just a little too strange. Speaking of that note Im beginning to think maybe I should just start telling people we're Mormon (no offense in any way to anyone who is Mormon) because maybe then they would get the whole not drinking thing and just lay off, while Im not saying I never drink I do like the occasional sweeter glass of wine, I've never liked the taste of alcohol and I hate beer I pretty much just slammed enough to get instantly wasted in college in order to drink more, J cannot drink due to medical reasons which sucks for him because he would really like to if he could but I just don't understand how something like that can be such a big deal, I mean we have lost friends over it, I guess looking back maybe those friendships were only based on alcohol but if thats the case thats just a sad sack really, and you have to wonder how many friendships out there are only based on a beverage? 

What happened to when Stephanie was Step-on-Me

What is it with people and the crazy baby names these days, while my distant family is equally to blame since my mom's cousin named their kid Autumn Sky like 4 months ago (thankfully they only call her Autumn which I don't mind it's when it's paired with something like Sky that creeps me out) it seems that names today are just plain strange and the spellings just keep getting weirder and weirder. While I am all for unique baby names, I think that there is a certain amount of thought that needs to go into it, for example if you're going to give your child a whacked out first name maybe give them a traditional middle name so if they really hate it they can go by their middle name.  Today when I went to look up the baby picture of a family friend's new little one (with a totally wonderful normal name) I came across this wee little girl named Stormy Sky. Did her parents just look out the window during labor and say whoa its storming lets name her stormy sky or did some amount of legitimate thought go into such a name? Based on her picture and hair and eye color I couldn't think of any ethnic or cultural reason to name her that. Im not really sure which scares me more, that they thought about it and chose that name or that they picked this poor child's name on some kind of whim. Also what is with having 20 different ways to spell Kate, or any other name for that matter. How can you teach your child to read if their name doesn't even phonetically make sense? We used to have to get creative when we were young in order to make fun of someone's name, now the parents are just handing the material right to the kids. Oye I tell you Oye. 

Life Post Bar

Sadly I do not really know what to do with myself these days, I have two weeks off before I start working, though we do have to trek to Oklahoma to J's brothers wedding in like a week or so and there is a GPB reunion this weekend but during the week Im kinda at a loss here.  I really need to catch up on some boring stuff like bills and what not and I've already begun immersing myself in fictional books...

Heres what Im Reading:

Firefly Lane

Letters to my Daughters

Reunion

Heres my List of what I want to read:

All books by Elizabeth Noble

Twilight Series

The Girls

Heres what I have read lately and in general though not everything I have read as that would take forever:

All of Jodi Piccoult's books (great books)

The Hannah Swenson Series

Belong to Me (very good I recommend it)

Amish Grace

Eat Pray Love

Lucy Stone Mysteries

All of Sophie Kinsella's books

The Dark Materials Collection

The Sugar Queen (also super good)

so many others I am beginning to think that I need to start writing them down

If anyone has any suggestions I love reading new books and will try about anything!

Reflections...

Top 5 Things I HATED about the WI Bar Exam

1. The Exam (never again do I want to see a multiple choice question)

2. The lack of organization and mean proctors with creepy fingernails, so much for ever starting on time

3. The Concourse hotels inability to get room service to me on time and making me have to skip breakfast on test day

4. The handle on my door which Im pretty sure I have bruises from trying to get to work

5. The mean stuck up examinees that wouldn't talk to anyone else, like the guy I got stuck sitting next to

Top 5 Things I LOVED about the WI Bar Exam (that have nothing to do with the exam really)

1. Seeing my St. Thomas friends for 3 days, awww it was kinda like being back in school again when they were all close by and you could see them all the time during the day

2. Sitting by the lake at UW it was such a great day even if it did involve essays it was super nice outside and great to just sit down and enjoy the lake and weather

3. State street- while we didn't really eat at any great local restaurants I did get to enjoy some of my favorite chains and look around in some great little shops where I bought a cute pair of turquoise earrings

4. My t-shirt I bought that says It's hard to be humble when your from Wisconsin,  I Love it!

5. Room Service- I could really get used to someone delivering me lunch everyday

Now I just secretly count the days to September in hopes I never have to do that again. Meanwhile I will enjoy my 18 days of summer, tonight Emerson Drive concert in Albert Lea with the little sis and J and neighbors. Perhaps one of these days I will even get a bit of a tan.

Good Luck

Before I begin my trek to Madison I just want to wish all me fellow bar takers across the USA GOOD LUCK!!!! and for those of you that have a three day bar exam an extra good luck, my heart goes out to you, thats a total bummer, I'll be thinking about you, honestly after Wednesday I probably won't be thinking about anything, but Im thinking about you today! Wishing you all the best. A.

Where Wizardry and Wills collide!!!

In making my flash card for wills that reminded me that half bloods take as whole bloods I had to restrain myself from adding a.k.a. people who are only of one half magical descent, see in reference Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince, sometimes called mudblood, hopefully I will also resist this urge on the exam should it come up. If only I were watching Harry Potter now =(

Why oh Why...

Would anyone develop such a thing as secured transactions, and why won't that super annoying guy's voice screaming PMSI not stop, in total desperation I re-listened to the entire Secured Transaction lecture last night (the benefit of having BarBri on an Ipod) and all I got out of it was that PMSI's are a sure way to give someone PMS and all future car buying has been ruined because it will now be accompanied by that voice screaming "PMSI, pay in cash so these guys can't repo your car if you go broke paying back your law school loans".  I wonder how many points they'll give me if I write that one as my answer and that I am a super light sleeper so there will definitely be a breach of peace if they try to repo my car, dirty dirty repo men or women. (In case you were worried, I have never missed a car payment and don't every expect to this is all just hypothetical angst against secured transactions) 

Dear Wisconsin Bar Examiners...

How many people give up like 6 six days before, because I really really want to? Could you maybe cut me some slack and at least let me type the essays though since I'm pretty sure I will fail them better I write them at least it may seem like I wrote more.  Thanks A

 P.S. If you could avoid civil procedure I would really appreciate it, how about just torts and criminal law that sounds fabulous!! 

P.P.S. Can I wear wellies and fill the extra room around my legs with candy? It would really save room in my baggie

Things I will do if I survive this and am greatly looking forward to:

1. Sleep

2. Have a Golden Girls marathon in honor of Estelle Getty (RIP Sophia)

3. Ride all the rides at the County Fair

4. Visit my long lost GPB sorority sisters in Madison

5. Go shopping for all things pink and green and for shoes and handbags and oh so much fun

6. Read as much fictional nonsense as I can cram into my brain in order to flush away all the legal nonsense I am trying to memorize

7. Take the El to the dog park as much as she would like (She would live there if she could sadly no fence for her to have semi-freedom here yet)

8. Clean my house and reunite myself with above par personal hygiene (for those of you also taking the bar I promise I will resort back to that upon my arrival in Madison, some people may consider lack of personal hygiene as some strange tactic to divert other test takers however I will not resort to that, primarily because I think it would harm me more than you)

9. Get a massage or mani/pedi something where all I have to do is sit there listlessly

10. Spend as much time with J to make up for the ignoring and studying over the past however long.

Limited increase in intelligence...

In what I believe is a direct correlation to my limited focus on the law but most specifically those subjects specifically on the Bar, the following things have greatly deteriorated:

1. My spelling abilities (be glad I edit)

2. My typing abilities (see notation above)

3. My Patience-why won't the El stop barking, we specifically got a Basset because people rave about their stellar personalities, laziness, determination in eating themselves to death, and abilities with kids, well Ella loves to bark at me when she's peeved like a raged teenager, my little cousins are terrified of her and while she would definitely eat herself to death if let she is actually pretty small for a Basset oh and she runs Nascar like circles around our living room/kitchen in a race against herself, really a healthy study environment, but at least she's fashionable she has claimed our new hounds tooth chair for herself

4. Personal Hygiene ( Sad I know and really a bit gross but does Conviser or my Ipod really care if I smell or how frequently I wash my hair, though J and El might, I'm pretty sure I read somewhere that washing your hair is overrated, maybe my stylist will at least approve of this new bad habit)

5. Alcohol Tolerance (for those of you who know me if it wasn't bad enough it is even worse, I had one drink last night and woke up hungover apparently bacardi lemon does that to me now, sad again)

Lastly, while studying Criminal Law I cannot help but contemplate the various crimes I would commit for Diploma Privilege!!! 

Rules Rules and More Rules, always dragging a girl down!

So I got a lovely letter from the WI bar examiners chalk full of rules for test day and full of prohibited items. Such as regardless whether the Concourse wants to blow frigid air on us no jackets will be allowed, obviously for fear that we would line them with Convisor as opposed to something that would keep us warm. For the same reason I assume all sweatshirts/sweaters must be either worn or hanging over the back of your chair.  So my question is what if I have a long sleeve shirt printed with all the rules of evidence on it, wear it and merely look at myself a lot during the test, there was nothing prohibiting that in there!!!! Also no flip flops, they clearly don't understand that the only tan lines I currently have are from my flip flops and they really aren't shoes but an extension of my body for the 5 warm months of the year and without them I will feel naked during the exam.  P.S. for those of you loving flip flops as well J.Crew had a bunch on sale on Friday for 9.99 plus 25% off, crazy I know, final sale only though.  Also not only can I not have a pink pen, sigh, I shall live, I cannot even bring my own pens, they will be provided because perhaps I shall bring one that talks back to me or something and while I can bring pencils they have to be wooden. Can anyone remember the last time they used a wooden pencil? I think it was art class in high school. I have to use this pencil for 6 hours, are they going to pay for the medication its going to take to numb that blister? Because Im experiencing pain just thinking about it. But really the most important question it leaves me pondering is what type of CANDY I want to bring, I love candy and am allowed a small bag like either a normal bag of candy such as skittles would come in or a ziplock snack bag full of a mixture, the purpose is to keep us hyped up and alert for the exam, I think Im leaning toward a mixture of candy any suggestions out there as to what the best candy to keep you going is????

I think the Tooth Fairy hates me!!!

I remember when I was little and I lost a tooth I would get a dollar, sometimes two dollars when no one could remember if the other had left the dollar from the tooth fairy, and it was all bliss to lose a tooth, it came out, you made money and another one grew in.  When I was a junior I got hit in the mouth with a softball and it killed the tooth, I wonder if there could be legal action against the person who threw the softball for tooth murder. Needless to say no tooth fairy arrived to give me money for my tooth when it died, in fact it didn't even get a proper burial or flowers.  But it has cost me going on $2,000 and a WHOLE TON OF PAIN to fix it.  Today was one of the special days where I got to go see the Periodontist who gets to reach into her bag of tools and come up with some new way to torture me, today it was with something they call a punch, like they punched out my gum tissue like it was cookie dough with a cutter.  Last time it was getting drilled into my skull. Sadly the worse part of the whole experience is that it hurt so bad when they gave me the novocaine into the soft tissue above the gums that I actually burst into tears, how SAD IS THAT, I survived all of law school, am determined to survive this darn Bar thing and I just cried at the dentist at 25 years old.  If it wasn't for all the money I've sunk into it I think I might never go back.  Then as I was leaving, with a smile she says, now don't be alarmed if there is a little bit of metal showing alright, what she should have said is when you smile in the mirror it will look like a 2nd metal tooth is growing out of your gums on top of your first tooth (and this is the tooth next to my front tooth so it isn't exactly hidden) so really you should hibernate and study for the bar and not go anywhere until your next appointment in three weeks since you kinda look like an alien. Then at least maybe I could have replied with why couldn't it be pink? I suppose that is enough whining about the periodontist though secretly it may have maybe made me love the law a little more as I left because I wouldn't want to be a mouth torturer all day but now as I sit here I'm not sure which is worse sitting in that chair and letting her poke and prod me or studying for the bar?

If I die before the Bar....

well at least I didn't have to take it! My rationalization in writing this is that there is an extremely severe thunderstorm warning, scary sounds coming from outside and it is almost as dark at night at 3pm and therefore if Im going to die it sure isn't going to be studying.  More than likely screaming at my very angry Basset puppy to please be quiet (yes that is exactly how Im yelling it, sigh).  

For whatever reason my Hubby, ugh I hate that word,we'll call him J seems to think that I should write a book. Clearly a fictional book because now that law school's done I will not do anything that involves citations without the guarantee of a paycheck. Shoes and Pink things don't pay for themselves you know. So in the past I have tossed around many ideas for possible books the winning idea thus far is a string of trashy romance murder mysteries centering around a bridal shop owner who solves murder mysteries that are threatening her clients upcoming nuptials. Who doesn't love trashy romance mystery novels!!! 

Well let me tell you how apparently lost in Real Property I have become because the other night while laying in bed I had an epiphany to write a book called the Fertile Octogenarian (Dear God, its me Margaret if I can't spell Octogenarian can I still pass the bar?) anyhoo the basic premise would be ignoring the RAP for those of you legal eagles that have any idea what it is and for those who don't think of it like the VD of Property Law. The book would basically center on some ancient guy who kicked the bucket had like 9 wives and left lots of heirs all ages, as a result of a clause that is likely not legal (crap mental note to study so I know the legality of my own ideas) five of the heirs, aka ppl that want this guys stuff, have to get together for 48 hours and decide who gets the big house and land.  Then it gets all sappy and they remember what they love about this old hustler and how they have such good memories etc blah blah blah then somehow can't give away the ending someone gets the land.  If your not already going WTF (excuse me Im normally not that crass) clearly your a property lawyer because really a) who would want to read this and b) who would want to write this.  It gets even better when I name one of the characters Sugar.  So if anyone is surfing the bargain book bins at B&N in a couple years and finds a book such as this please check the authors name and then send my husband donations for my mental health bills if he hasn't already divorced me.  Clearly I've lost it. Or perhaps I never had it. I should obviously stick to things I know.  On another note they keep telling me only black or blue pens on the bar, which I have to write since WI hates me, this really cramps my affection for pink pens.